Weekly with Carly: Salty Kisses

By: Carly Clegg
By: Carly Clegg

College Station, Texas Happy Friday everyone! I hope each of you had a relaxing, fun, and most importantly safe spring break.

How did you spend your week off? Did you travel? Finish a book? Visit family? Eat at your favorite restaurants? Listen to music at SXSW in Austin?

Me? You ask- well I spent my last and final spring break hunting for wedding venues! YES I’M GETTING MARRIED and WOW are there a lot of fun options to choose from.

Lets just say, I learned a lot of lingo- (candelabras-sounds like a type of snake, runners-a strip of fabric to decorate the tables (what?), organza-can we just keep it at tulle-every seven year old girl knows what tulle is, bunting-more fabric, interactive stations-mash potato martinis-YUM, a sweet heart table-why would you want a table for two when you have all your best friends and family to mingle with-lets get real, we won’t be sitting, but thanks!)

Ok, and yes-I’ll be honest, I acted like I knew every.single.word. A prepared bride is a poised bride-on the outside. Closed mouth smiles, nods, eye contact and good posture make for a convincing façade.

Word to the wise, if you feel like doing your homework review the ‘Ultimate Reception Lingo Guide’ HERE and you won’t be confused at first like I was.

However, eventually I caught on, drove all over the Dallas metroplex with my momma, future mother-in-law and one of my little brothers. Throughout the experience we all debated on pros and cons of each venue, ate lunch, laughed a lot, and bonded on a whole new level.

Getting married means you’re growing up, you’re about to make one heck of a commitment, but you’re also gaining more family members! And to that I say-the more the merrier!

Another piece of advice, don’t go into wedding planning with a business deal attitude. I understand there will be dollar signs at the end of the tour, but take it all in, dream, imagine, and enjoy every step of the way. Although some dollar signs were too high, we kept reminding ourselves that looking is free, and fun-especially when you have a great tour guide! Never forget the true meaning of a wedding-the matrimony of you and the love of your life. All of the planning takes about a year to finish-the night will be over in what seems like thirty minutes, so take baby steps if you have the time, and don’t forget to laugh and have fun along the way.

God’s idea of a wedding doesn’t really include ice sculptures, a $2,000 wedding dress, an open bar, bickering and fighting with family, a Hollywood DJ with special effects, or helicopters-it includes love, family, celebration, friends, a future, two lives becoming one, and a whole lot of happiness. No shame in a swam made out of ice-as long as you remember who and what is more important at the end of that very special day.

Ok-well y’all, the real topic I want to touch on this week is long distance relationships. (I just had to update y’all on what has been going on in my life-I’m too excited!!)

(Notice I didn’t mention Trent’s name above.) Well folks, not only do we not get to see each other during the school year, but this year-we didn’t get to spend spring break together. Which means we had a whopping 3 days to catch up, wedding plan, relax, and sneak in a kiss or two. Thankfully, this semester we have been blessed with the ability to see each other more often than not so we are grateful for that.

We’re grateful for a lot of things. Like the fact that our cars are still in good enough condition to drive over 600 miles there and back from Lubbock to College Station. We’re grateful for technology-snail mail would make things a little more difficult had skype, texting, email, facetime, and the like hadn’t been invented. We’re grateful for Jesus-for showing us so much love, grace, guidance, and perseverance to get us through this difficult time. We’re grateful for growing together separately- living independently is a powerful and important part of having a strong relationship. We’re grateful for our families. Our friends-who keep us smiling and encouraged. Grateful for the times when we get to run to each other like Noah and Allie in The Notebook-cue piano theme song here. We are grateful for surprise packages. For getting to meet our college friends. For opening up our circle and broadening our horizons. Grateful for graduation.

Grateful for the lessons learned along the way.

The best part of being in a long distance relationship is the excitement! Counting down the days, hours, minutes till we see each other again! The anxiousness of getting to tell each other everything we’ve been up to, to every last detail. The worst part is that whole goodbye thing. That part where you know you have only 10 more minutes till you have to get on the road before traffic hits. Your throat tightens up and your eyes begin to burn. This part hurts. You dread this part the moment the both of you are reunited.

This part, helps you become stronger.

Unfortunately, I can’t tell you that each goodbye gets easier-because for me, each goodbye gets harder.

But guess what that means?! That means your love is growing stronger. You’re falling harder in love. And you’re ready to start spending every day, every night with that person. But be patient sweet reader, good things come to those who wait.

I’ve always told myself that if I were to ever write a book, it would be titled Salty Kisses.

Tears are an honest thing.

They bring about your true feelings, your passions, what makes you happy and what brings you sorrow. You can’t fight tears-I’ve tried and they fall…

And when they fall, and you share your last embrace, there’s a mutual feeling of mourning. A moment that cannot be explained. It hurts, you feel weak, (darn it your dang mascara is probably smeared all over his shirt-but he doesn’t care-because, well his eyes are swelled up too) and from that moment, you start to plan when the two of you will get to see each other again.

I’M REALLY NOT TRYING TO BE A DOWNER HERE. I’m just being honest. And with honesty comes embarrassing confessions. I just want to let you know, whoever you are, whether you’re in a long distance relationship or not-I am with you, whether I sound pathetic or not.
And hey-if you’re in a long distance relationship with your best friend-I’m there with you too.

Being in a long distance relationship sets you apart from the norm. It’s not easy-which makes you a fighter! You’re a tough chick/dude! You can live/survive your life without your ultimate partner in crime-Batman can’t even do that!

So technically you’re a superhero. (Hey maybe instead of a book I should illustrate and start a new comic strip!)

Technically, you can overcome any battle. Because when God brings you to it, He’ll pull you through it. And you can trust me on that. If you’re fully equipped with the armor of God, you are limitless.

L I M I T L E S S. Pretty empowering huh?

Being in a long distance relationship might not be ideal, but if you stay positive and look at everything you have instead of focusing on the things you don’t have- you’ll appreciate this chapter of your life. Had Trent and I gone to the same university, we might not have met the people that are in our lives today. Or heck-we might not even be together. We might not have the strong relationship with Christ as we do today.

Being together separately takes determination but I promise, you will be amazed at the amount of blessings that is bestowed upon your life to get you through it.

Enjoy not having to worry about being in the dating world. Whether you’re in college or not-dating is tough, and I’m glad God knew that I’m not up for that. Enjoy having time with your friends. Enjoy learning new things. Enjoy independence-because it will get you a long way. Enjoy the quiet times-even though that’s when you’ll think a lot. But thinking is good.

I hope I’ve encouraged you or someone you know that is in a long distance relationship to stay strong, look at the positives, and to appreciate the season you’re in. It’s easy to wish for tomorrow to come, but enjoy each day, because you’ll regret when you’re 45 that you wished for time to pass quickly. As Beyonce would say, we are “survivors” and I know each of you will not only make it out on top-but will have a better relationship because of it all.

Have the best weekend, be safe, and be kind to one another.

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