Viral Video of the Week Installment 3

By: John Obenauf Email
By: John Obenauf Email

Welcome back to the Viral Video of the Week! Boy do I have some delicious videos in store for you all this week. ”How delicious?” you might ask? Well rest assured they’re very palatable – like “finding a Funyun in between your seat cushion and, even though you can’t remember the last time you ate Funyuns, you say ‘screw it, it’s not that stale’” delicious.

Speaking of stale snack foods, here’s a video that’s sure to bring you back to a much simpler time in everyone’s lives: the preteen years – the era when everyone’s biggest worry was visible acne and when picking on someone else for “being different” meant you were one of the cool kids:

How this video hasn’t already become “the next big thing” is beyond me, really. What’s better than a gaggle of middle schoolers rapping about snacks? Nothing. This video is almost perfect. Almost. The only thing that would’ve made that better is more of that little guy (“Number 5”), who comes in at 2:45 – can we just go ahead and give that kid a contract now and give him a bunch of “featured” spots for the next 25+ years? Or are there stricter child-labor laws within the music industry now after the whole “Willow Smith” thing? Whatever the case, I hope parents everywhere take a hint from this video and start letting their kids eat whatever the heck they want; I don’t see any groups of 8 year olds rapping about apple slices and celery sticks – healthy snacks obviously stifle artistic creativity. It’s been scientifically proven by this video.

As I mentioned in the previous blog, classes started this past week in Aggieland and, though I might only have one measly semester left of this whole “college” thing, never have I had stronger urges to just say “screw it” and join the circus. I’m serious, I heard they have a killer dental plan. Anyways, this video just about sums up my first week of school:

Yep, my experience down to a tee. Only that video probably focused less on girls’ boobs.

Speaking of creeping, here’s a video that’s sure to make you question your trust in old people:

Ok, so that dude might be a tad bit “creepy,” and “letting him meet my kids” is probably one of the last things on your to-do list, but you can’t argue with the fact that this dude is entertaining. Go ahead; watch some of his other videos. I challenge you to not wish, even at least a little bit, that this wasn’t your pep-pep too. It’s ok, I won’t tell pee-paw nuthin’.

And of course, last but not least, it’s the weekly cute-animal clip of the week. I know, I know, I dropped the “crotch shot” half to the “cute-animal/crotch-shot of the week” without even adding one little crotch-shot clip to the blog but, honestly, I can’t stomach sifting through all those painful videos - they hit a little too close to home, if ya’ know what I’m sayin’.

You know what? Screw it. Here’s both a cute-animal clip AND a crotch-shot video, AT THE SAME TIME. You’re welcome:

So maybe those animals weren’t necessarily “cute,” and maybe that shot wasn’t necessarily “crotchy” enough, but it’s the best I could muster! YouTube is hard, OK?

Welp, that’s gonna do it for this week’s blog. I hope you all have a great weekend and find a way to stay dry from that hurricane going on over there. Until next week my viral companions!
-John Obenauf
Former member of Pac Man Jones’ posse


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