As sorority sisters, especially living in the sorority house, boundaries go out the srat house window. You can only imagine how close you get to one another when you’re living in such close quarters. Sharing everything. I mean everything! Hair brushes, razors, underwear... yeah, it’s true. Don't put anything past my sisters.
Living in this environment makes it easy to feel overly comfortable with your girls. Seriously. It’s a good thing boys aren’t allowed upstairs, because they'd see some things they shouldn't. Like running down the upstairs halls of the sorority mansion naked? Which is not cute by the way. What happened to wearing a robe, or anything for that matter, in public? I need therapy after all of the uncensored nudity displayed upstairs in the sorority house. My “sisters” are closet nudists.
One time, after a day of “dartying” (day partying) one sister decided to drunkenly venture through the halls, clay mask on, hair in a very messy bun, and toweless loudly declaring, "I don't care, take a picture of me. I just might go nude all the time anyway!" Next thing you know, girls are streaking down the hallway, praying the house mom didn’t walk upstairs to see the drunken chaos. Oh yes, and this is on video somewhere too.
Obviously, I didn't participate. Just because I live with you in the sorority house doesn’t mean I want to see you naked. Yes, I know we are all girls, but my body is for my eyes only and for that matter, your body should be for your eyes ONLY. You must have gotten your six packs confused...
I don't care that I live in the sorority house with just one or over 40 girls. I don’t want to have to wash my hands next to you looking at your naked body in the mirror either. Do me and everyone else in the house a favor and put a towel, cloth, toga or anything on!
I am simply tickled pink you just gave yourself a brazilian wax, but over my dead body do I want to see it, and I honestly think you are an idiot to wax yourself anyway. Just because we are “sisters” doesn’t mean I would let you put hot wax on a very private area and rip it off. While we’re at it, I don’t want to help you “do yours” either.
You are not my real sister. Let’s be real, I have lived with you for eh... maybe a month. Half the time I just call you “girl” when I want your attention because I don’t remember your name. You must be incredibly high or stupid to think that I would let you give me a brazilian wax. I would much rather see you in your Victoria’s Secret lace thong that you love to prance around in than see you displayed like Simba from the Lion King letting it all hang out for the world, or other girls living in the house, to witness. It's out of control.
Call me old fashioned, or normal, but wearing a bra upstairs would be nice too. I may smile when you try to talk to me without a bra on, but I must confess, it is incredibly disturbing and awkward as hell. Now I feel a little bad for guys when we catch them looking at us, wait, not really. Most are still pervs.
I know for a fact my irises burn at the sight of your nipples, so I feel awful for our house mom. It’s no wonder she is looking older every day, she has to avoid looking at naked girls running around upstairs and keep their hormone driven boyfriends downstairs and out of the madness. That is a bad reality show waiting to happen.
Tequila really does make your clothes fall off, and trust me, it’s not pretty. I was just trying to be a nice house mate, sorority sister, friend- whatever you want to call me- when I tucked your naked body in that Anthropologie-decorated bed every time you came home smashed. I would say, let’s not make this a habit, but I guess it's too late for that. I have had enough opportunities to take pictures of you in your birthday suit that I could make Hugh Hefner jealous!
On that note, my vodka soda is waiting for me. I have a lot of images I'd like to erase from my memory.
See you on the row.
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